IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer: Crime prevention (Band 9)

IELTS Writing Task 2 essay with model answer

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic

Some people think that the government should be responsible for crime prevention, while others believe that it is the responsibility of the individual to protect themselves. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Write at least 250 words.

Model Answer:

One of the highly controversial issues today relates to that of crime prevention. While some people believe that government should take the responsibility for crime prevention, some others think that every person should be responsible for their safety and defend themselves against crime. This essay discusses why self-protection is very important but why the role of government is more efficient in preventing crime. 

Self-defense is certainly one of the most efficient ways to avoid crime. Mastering certain techniques like Kungfu, Karate, Boxing can definitely help a common man protect himself and his family from criminals. For instance, in Japan, achieving a black belt in Karate is mandatory for every student because people believe in making students independent. Thus, students are made to undergo such training so that they are able to protect themselves from an unforeseen incidence of violence or crime. Thus, it is easy to see why it is important to be independent and hold responsibility for preventing any criminal activity.

However, not everyone can be independent, and also, the intensity of crime can be quite high. In such situations, if government tightens the rules and ensures that the police department is proactive, definitely everyone fears the punishments and tends to stay away from crime. For example, a recent survey showed that the main reason for 0.2% crime rate in the USA is ridiculously strict rules and an intensely proactive criminal department. Thus, it goes without saying that the government has a major responsibility in preventing crime. 

Reducing the crime rate is very important for creating a safe and peaceful environment in the country. This essay discussed why people should learn to be independent and acquire some self-defense techniques; nonetheless, the role of government is more important in reducing crime. In my opinion, the rules framed by the government are more efficient than self-defense in preventing crime. 

 

Total Words: 250

Task Achievement: 9

Coherence & Cohesion: 9

Lexical resources: 9

Grammar: 9

Overall Score: Band 9

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