IELTS Writing Task 2 essay with model answer
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic.
Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with.
What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys?
Write at least 250 words.
In today's world, children are given the luxury to enjoy their childhood with a huge number of toys provided to them. I personally feel that such actions are detrimental to kids in the long run. In this essay I will shed some light on the benefits and drawbacks of this trend.
A common belief some people have is that, young ones who are oversupplied with toys will automatically be engrossed in their play time. As a result, naughty children will be preoccupied with play and not disturb their parents. However, if we look from a different angle, such actions suggest that children will always have an upper-hand in the deal demanding new exclusive toys to be given to them. As a result, parents will be forced to spend a hefty amount just to fulfil the needs of their offspring. Thus, in the long run, catering to such unnecessary wants will leave a hole in the parents' pockets as having too many toys is merely a waste of money.
Another disadvantage is that, an enormous number of toys adds to a child’s ego. Children, by nature are very competitive in all aspects. In Malaysia, for example, having a premium doll collection, is said to display a child's social standards. This leads to a damaging effect when such affluent youngsters mingle in school just to boast about their materialistic belongings. This luxury showcase will definitely offend other young ones and make them feel belittled.
In conclusion, although parents may think that buying more toys actually benefits both their children and themselves, but in fact toys deplete family budgets and act as a means of promoting negative competition among children.
Total Words: 277
Task Achievement: 9
Coherence & Cohesion: 9
Lexical resources: 9
Overall Score: Band 9Tags: academic academic training essay writing general general training model answer wrg task 2 writing essay writing task 2
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i think it does not deserve band 9